1 Thing I Learned from My International Placement Experience

My placement has long been over but I've been away for much of the summer so I have yet to wrap up my international placement experience. While I've been away, I've been reminded of how writing is an outlet for expressing my thoughts and feelings, but motivation can be so hard to find. Now that I'm settling back into being at home, I've got no real excuses about why I'm not writing. This piece is so long over due and probably one of the hardest (and longest!) posts I've written so far because it's taken a lot of self-reflection and hard thinking. It's kind of a mix between what I wanted to write in a "Who Am I Out of Context? Part 2" post and as a summary reflection. I hope that you can understand the thoughts that I'm about to share with you. 

I consider my international placement experience a valuable mix between education/work and self-discovery. I initially started by naming this post "5 Things I Learned..." because I thought that it would be nice to be able to get a list of things down that I've learned in those 2 months. (Also because I love lists!) Between travelling alone, living in a new country and working/having an educational experience in a culturally different setting --5 things should be easy, right? I had some ideas for sure (which I've incorporated into this post), but I just couldn't get it down to 5 distinct things.

Then I thought. Life lessons are about quality, not quantity! (I swear, it's not because I got lazy.) So here it is. The 1, most important thing, that I've learned from my international placement experience:

TO EXPECT FAILURE.

I recently read about Jonathon Field's Good Life Project and heard his interview with Chris Guillebeau (who writes an amazing blog with great life/work/travel advice!). Chris brings up a good point about how the possibility of failure has to be on the table. Failure needs to be considered, it Must be part of your expectations. I know this lesson isn't anything new. How many times has someone with more life experience told you to "expect the unexpected"? I think most of you would agree with me that it is something that sounds much easier in theory than in reality. I've sat on this idea for a while and I think this mindset takes another level of openmindedness and resourcefulness. The funny thing is, these were two traits I thought I had before flying over for my placement. 

Being Openminded and Flexible in Your Expectations.

In school and life in general, we're often told to be openminded. Being able to appreciate unique perspectives and be flexible in unexpected circumstances ultimately comes down to our expectations. But even more than expecting differences and change, I  never viewed openmindedness to be about anticipating a total mismatch between expectations and reality. To face the absolute: "You are Wrong. You can not achieve any part of what you expected, period. Now what will you do?" You can say that's what happened for me.

• I did Not expect to have a less than positive relationship with my preceptor.
• I did Not expect to experience to have felt the amount of stress I did just on my way to and from placement each and everyday.
• I did Not expect to miss home as much as I did.
• I did Not expect to feel lost about who I am and question my original objectives of choosing to do a placement abroad where I knew nobody.
• I did Not expect to have a discussion with my preceptor that required the student coordinator to be a mediator.
• I did Not expect to be told that I can Not be a therapist.
• I did Not expect to have to switch placements.
• I did Not expect to Fail.

For a while into my new placement setting, I felt that I had failed my entire placement. It was not easy to choose to switch because I did not want to feel that I had "given up" on my initial placement. I definitely saw this final placement as a challenge, but I had hoped that I would still complete my placement in the initial hospital setting and "make it through" so to speak. Even the word "switching" seems like choosing an escape, or using a shortcut to find the easy way out. I like to see things through to the end despite adversity. Many people have told me that my switch was not me giving up, but more like keeping my objectives of my international placement in focus and choosing my battles. Right now, I've come to terms with the fact that switching placements was not a complete Failure. This did not come easily to me. I've come to realize that I had viewed my switch as a failure in my books because I had only anticipated success. Let me clarify that.

I know that some of you reading this may not understand why I should expect a negative outcome because it's reasonable to believe that it would set up a self-fulfilling prophecy, right? What I mean by "expecting failure" is to have it as a consideration, so that if and when it happens, you can feel slightly more prepared for it. Another way to think about this is to broaden your vision of what success would mean to you. Rather than conceptualizing success to mean that something happens in a certain way, without a hitch, allow for alternative endings. I'm no perfectionist, but just the thought of this can make me feel a bit uncomfortable. But hey! Better to feel uncomfortable now, at the thought of the potential failure, than to have it hit you hard because it snuck up on you right?

My really really bad paddle splint...

We're always encouraged to see the best in who we are, what we do, and strive to become a better version of ourselves. Expecting to see a less than ideal form of yourself is such a hard thing to do! It's hard to face yourself when you feel like you've let others, especially yourself, down. We're our toughest critic and a lot of deep breathing will need to happen as we come to embrace this experimental mindset. Asking yourself questions like: "How would I feel about myself if I tried my very best, and I only got there, instead of There." Believe me, I still struggle with this even when it's all over. As someone wise has told me before: Only when  you're feeling uncomfortable, are you truly learning.

Learning to Ask for and Accept Help

I've always been pretty independent and when there's a problem, I like to try to solve it myself before asking for help. Even if it means that I have to do things the hard way, I've always found a certain triumph in being able to say that I did it myself. Travelling alone and being alone in a new country has definitely taught me to put that sort of "lone wolf" thinking aside. At times when I felt stressed and sad, I was still able to feel the support of my family and friends from the other side of the world. I felt less alone with their encouragement and learned to reach out for help and feel ok about it.

I also met some great people in Hong Kong. Never in my life did I think that making friends could be this easy. Personally, I've always been a bit more comfortable asking for help than accepting it. The way I saw it, me asking for helping is still about me taking an initiative and taking action towards solving my own problem. Whereas, accepting help offered by someone else was harder for me. But by accepting the generosity of others, I was also accepting their invitation to a friendship. I will never forget the friend who was always ready to lend me a hand, an ear to listen to my troubles and a tissue when I needed it. I had mentioned in a passing conversation that my student residence didn't provide me with a pillow and she immediately told me that she'd lend me hers. Of course, I didn't want her to have to lug a pillow all the way to placement for me since I knew it was a very long bus ride for her. But there she was, the next day, with her pillow.

Or the running friends I made, who insisted on inviting me to join their dinners after our runs. Time and time again I would decline because I always needed to head back early to prepare for my next day at placement. The few meals where I was able to sit at the same table and eat with them were so meaningful to me! Often I was the most quiet because I wanted to listen and hear their stories.

My friend Pinky came with me to see me off!

Running with these fearless people was definitely one of the hi-lights to my time in Hong Kong!

The warmth and generosity that these friends showed me in our little time together is something that I'm so grateful for. These people taught me that it's ok for people to need people. You'd think that studying to work as an occupational therapist, a helping profession, would've taught me that. Some things just can't be learned in class.

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Wow. That was long. And now that I've finished tying up the loose ends from my placement. I'll need to think of the direction I want this blog to take from here on out!