How do I Express Myself Creatively?

[Lab 10- May 24: Enabling Change Through Expression]

My Painted Representation of My Inner Self

Definitely one of the most enjoyable PE Labs yet! I felt like a little kid again! (The last time I said that was when our family went to Universal Studios and Disney World)

In this lab, we engaged in creating portraits of our inner self, what we think others perceive us as, and express our emotions through painting, sculpture and music respectively. When was the last time I did any of this type of personal expression??

Photography Allows Me to Express Emotions 
that I Can't Find Words For.

When I think of what I do for artistic expression, I think back to my days in the high school band. Music was my first and foremost way of expressing myself. I was part of my high school band as a flute player for 4 straight years, was also in the violin ensemble for one year and learned to play the alto saxophone so I could play in the jazz band one year. Sadly my engagement with music as a musician stopped after I auditioned for the wind ensemble in university and didn't get in.



What's my form of artistic expression now? Film photography!

One of my Favourite Sunsets from last summer.

I started to play with my dad's film cameras in late 2010, and I would say that I started to "seriously" try to learn and engage with film photography in late 2011. I still hesitate to share my hobby in film photography with others, even friends. Only my family and very close friends have seen my prints of my photos.

There's Something about FILM Photography.
An unpredictability that  makes me "commit" to the  moment.

I really enjoy the moments when I look through the small rectangular frame and collect my thoughts. I see something beautiful in front of me and I think to myself: "What about this do I want to capture?" "What feeling or story do I want to keep from this moment?"

I've come to learn that it takes me a very long time to gather words and express myself verbally. Taking photos allows me to concentrate on the Now and have the plethora of thoughts and feelings of that moment to come together. All the "noise" from everything happening around me disappears as I focus on the moment in front of me and think of how best to capture it. A sort of "mindfulness" if you will.

One of my Personal Favourites

With Film, I feel that there's a different commitment level from digital photography. Besides the cost of film. Not only are you not able to go back and delete the photo if you see that it's bad. There's simply less room for error because of how many exposures you have on the roll of film, and it's harder to correct for mistakes after you get your prints. (Admittedly, I am a beginner in film, so I do not know all the techniques that you can use during the developing process or after it's printed to "fix" film shots, so don't take my word for it). There's definitely a "what you take is what you get" premise that forces me to act on and express my feelings at that certain moment without holding back.

Slowly, I've been incorporating more technical thoughts like "What aperture setting should I have it at?" and ideas about better "composition" in my photos. I don't want this reflection to be about photography and its technicalities, but I can really appreciate the use of media and art as a form of self-expression and therapy. Creative expression can not only reach inside us to enable personal expression, but also open up our eyes to non-judgemental sharing and understanding of each others' experiences.

I'm very happy that our occupational therapy program includes these labs that are not only "fun" for us as students but also actively engages us to think about how we would answer the questions we ask our clients, and try these therapies out on ourselves. Because ultimately, we are all human beings and we, as future OTs need to be human to really connect with our clients.

RESOURCES to Listen To and Consider:

This TED Talk makes me miss being the musician that I was in high school and it reminds me that artistic expression is a universal language.

“And I understood that this was the very essence of art. We take something that exists in all of us, at our very fundamental core. Our emotions. And through our artistic lens, through our creativity. We are able to shape those emotions into reality. And the reality of that expression, reaches all of us. And moves us, inspires and unites us.” –Robert Gupta 

A student at the OT program at the University of Alberta takes the idea of our PE Labs one step further and wrote a paper discussing how an elective module in the MScOT program would enable students to develop an appreciation for, and ability in, scholarship and application of theory-informed practice (Brown et al, 2011). This proposed elective module was specifically in the therapeutic use of digital photography. I think that this is a good idea and electives such as literary arts and music would be well received by students in our program too.

Here's the case report that discusses the proposed elective module:
Brown, C. A., Halabi, M., MacDonald, K., Campbell, L., & Guenette, R. (2011). Photographic media for pain expression: Situated learning with graduated-entry masters students to develop skills in theory-to-practice. Creative Education, 2(2), 91-95.